Friday, April 1, 2011

The Lights

12:15 am. Sitting by my side is my laptop, as I head home after a brief conversation with my Gorgeous  Girlfriend on skype.

So, I head home, and I'm at the Piccadilly & Maritana St intersection, and rather than looking at the lights like it was the same set of lights that I pass every other day, I see them in a different light, and realise that there is a potential Kodak moment here. I have these moments every now and then, and they are often times just for a split second, when I look at the same thing that I have seen hundreds of times, and I go, "Wow. That would make a cool Photo." Well, this was one of those moments. 


It is like 1 am.

Nobody is around.

It feels weird.

I get my tripod out, set my camera up, and start. I almost get the photos that I want, but not the effect/sensation that I am hoping to achieve, and like many wise people have said time, and time again, "If at first you don't succeed, You're not Chuck Norris". I'm not Chuck Norris. So on that note, I stopped. Since, I am a man, and a primitive one at that, I struggle to do two things at once. I had an idea sprouting, and I cant take a photo, and think at the same time. I had to stop. So I did stop.

Would you like to know why I stopped? 
I stopped because the traffic lights changed color... Yes... Thats right. In hindsight, I am glad it was 1am. I hadn't seen anyone for the past half hour, and I am thankful for that. These Lights had my full attention, and I doubt that I would have noticed anyone driving past me. I come-to, and I begin attempting to create the image that I have in my mind. I had this idea. What if I could get all 3 colors in the one shot? I'm gonna do it. So I did. End of story? Far from it. You see between this moment, and the heading home after getting the photo I wanted was a good... maybe... hour?

Since all the traffic lights are set up on sensors, I set my tripod up under the lights and think, "Sick! Just gotta wait for a car now... 

... A car..." 

This is an issue at 1:30. So I think "Stuff this", and decide I'd use my car. So, I set my camera to a 10 second self timer, hit the shutter, sprint back to my car, drive it forward, and the lights start to change... Yeah Boi. Job done. I reverse backwards up the road like I own the joint, strut my stuff to my camera, inspect the goods, and my camera presents for me... A picture of one red light.

"Ok. Trial, and error. Thats cool."

I come to the conclusion that I just need to sprint to my car faster. So, I do it all again, and I get another photo of a red light. I dabble in various other techniques of getting in my car quicker. I had no other option. You see, I quickly worked out that jumping on spot where the car stops, still doesn't get the lights to change. My car was my only way of getting those lights to change.

I just decided I'd park my car at the traffic lights, and make the people driving past me have to stop, and so change the lights for me. I could feel their disgust through their cars as they pulled up, and scanned the scene to work out why the usually beautiful flow of traffic had come to a halt. They quickly realize that the cause was that guy over on the other side of the road, bending over, looking through a camera pointing up. Nowhere special, just up, and shower me with their ever present unhappiness. 

"I dont care any more. I want my photo, and you will help me get it. Tough titties."

I finally get my photo, and I can feel an 'Austin Powers' "YEAH BABY YEAH!" coming on, but I stop myself, because I see my local plod coming over the bridge. I turn around, and my car is sitting at the lights. You know, just chillin, and all the different scenarios are going through my head.

"Ok, I can grab my stuff, jump in the car, and pretend like my car wasn't actually sitting there for the last half hour... Or, I could just casually wave at the policemen, and pretend like nothing is wrong. Either way, I dont think a "Yeah, baby Yeah", will help me at this present moment."

I look back to my camera, and choose to go with the second option. I look at the cops, who are now in the turning lane. I am temped to wave, but I am not sure how well I could pull of an american tourist accent if worst comes to worst. I leave the wave alone. I stroll back to the car, and open my door to put my camera back. They are now doing a U turn to pull up beside me. Inside, I am going, "Please dont fine me. Please dont fine me. Please dont fine me. Please dont fine me." Still with half my body stuffed in the side of my car, I can hear the window being wound down, and stand up to face the music.

All or nothing now, "Hi Mate. Whats up?"

"You are parked at the lights."

"Is that not alright?", this comment was followed straight away with a thought: 
"... You actually just said that to the cop's face?"

"Ahhhhh. No. That's not alright"

"Not even just for a second?", this comment was followed with: 
"Please dont fine me. Please dont fine me. Please dont fine me. Please dont fine me."

He gives me that "you really are a tool" forced-laugh, and proceeds to tell me to move my car right now, and I can just carry my camera to where I want to take the photos.

"Ok. Thanks Mate." I turn around, and kinda think "I could have done that a little differently." Casually, I get into my car, and head home. I have a picture. I have a story. I do not have a fine. 


Mission successful.






The Traffic Lights